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Saturday 27 May 2017

Arts & Entertainment

The 10 Worst Films Of 2017 So Far

Saturday 13/May/2017 - 11:41 AM
Sada El Balad
Edited By: Yara Sameh

As we near the half-way point of the year، the output from the film studios so far has been pretty good، entertainment.ie reported.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol.2 was a welcome sequel that had all the joy and mirth of the original، whilst Alien: Covenant has managed to move the sci-fi horror franchise out of the mire. For the smaller films، documentaries like I Am Not Your Negro and independent films like Manchester By The Sea and Raw have been provocative and well-executed.
Of course، it's not all positive - there's been a LOT of crap this year، as well. Here's our take on the weakest films of the year so far.

10. THE SECRET SCRIPTURE
Despite having Ireland's foremost director Jim Sheridan behind the camera and Rooney Mara in front of it، there wasn't enough to save The Secret Scripture from being a flat، uninteresting melodrama with one of the worst endings we've seen in quite some time. We're not going to spoil it here، but basically it turns out Rooney Mara was a space-alien and was asleep the whole time. Actually، that would have been a better ending than the one we got.

9. CHIPS
Steve Mnuchin is currently the US Treasury Secretary in Donald Trump's administration. Steve Mnuchin is also an executive producer on CHiPs. You'd think those two facts don't relate to each other، but they say more about this film that mere words can. Like the Trump Administration، you're wondering how it even came into existence، what it says about the world that it's even there، and you're waiting desperately for it to be over before it does real، lasting damage.

8. SLEEPLESS
How can a film with a title like this be so sleep-inducing? You're just putting your hand out for a slap with a title like that، quite frankly.

7. FIST FIGHT
Charlie Day، we know، is a strong comedic actor and Ice Cube is the best part of 21 Jump Street and its sequel. On paper، this should have worked. It didn't. It really، really didn't.

6. THE BYE BYE MAN
No need for words because we've got a.GIF that's just perfect.

5. RESIDENT EVIL: THE FINAL CHAPTER
Come on، did you really think this was going to be good? You did? Buddy، I've got a bridge I want to sell you.

4. RINGS
Rings opens - no joke - with a plane crashing to the ground after the entire manifest sees the so-called video. There were times watching Rings that I hoped I would die in a plane crash so I wouldn't have to continue watching Rings.

3. SMURFS: THE LOST VILLAGE
Fine، this is a film for children. That's understandable and it can't really be held to the same standards as، y'know، other films. Nevertheless، Smurfs: The Lost Village was a terrible، awful، no-good film that featured cheap animation you'd expect to see on a loading screen for a PlayStation 2 videogame circa 2001. It also had Gordon Ramsay as a baking smurf. He's a chef، not a baker. How dare you.

2. FIFTY SHADES DARKER
Fifty Shades Darker is the seventh highest-grossing film of the year so far. It made $380 million worldwide. We، as a species، need to reflect on this fact daily and ask ourselves if we deserve to be custodians of this planet any longer.

1. UNDERWORLD: BLOOD WARS
As some point، you have to earnestly wonder why Kate Beckinsale continued on with Underworld. It was essentially a rip-off of The Matrix، except it had vampires and werewolves in it. That whole schtick died off around the time the Americans invaded Iraq - for the second time. That's how long ago that was. It's 2017 now and nobody told Kate Beckinsale that the world's moved on from leather trenchcoats.

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